Yo, I don’t mean to be dramatic or anything (yes I do), but we Bruce Willis was nowhere to be found.
Bruce. We needed you!
You’d better have a good excuse, is all I’m saying.
This is probably the breakfast I’m making the next time we’re threatened with the fate of the dinosaurs. Except I would add a mountain of cheese and chase it with whiskey… But that’s not going to happen, so here we are. Let’s keep it reasonable and live for a few more decades, I s’pose.
You know what’s stressful? Less so than being chased by wildebeests but probably more so than having the dryer eat your sock AGAIN? Going snowboarding for the first time in approximately two years, while never having been good to begin with.
Yikes. I don’t want to talk about it.
Also potentially stressful: appetizer preparation for a weeknight party. But, I’d rather handle that kind of stress than that of the gracefully gliding tumbling-down-an-icy-mountain-at-high-speed (read: not that high at all, I’m just a chicken) variety. I’d just rather not. Whatever.
It’s time to rain some cold hard facts on myself: I’m no adrenaline junkie. But I might be a jalapeno junkie. Are you with me? Let’s have a party and bring hummus. Continue reading →
I really needed this to turn out well… Not because I had anybody to impress or anything, but my insides needed a hug. It happens. I don’t do this often, but it turns out that my feelings taste like chicken.
There are many things wrong with me… That much is true. I’m terrible at exactly 100% of sports, 88% of conversation-making and 93% of general life skills. But the guacamole-making part of my brain works like a fine-tuned DELICIOUS machine.